confusion

hello
hola
hi
bon jour
anyong haseyo readers!

what i wanna share today is, all about my life lately
you know, i fail fail fail and fail all over again
i feel like i just waste my parent's money
yap,, its all my fault for registered my self in many universities
UIB
PB
Sanata Dharma
Untar
*almost register in Help university, malaysia* (so glad that my mom told me to think twice)

and last, i 'think' im gonna register in UCSI, malaysia
its quite expensive i think, thats why i ask my parents again and again, are they really sure?
and, they ask me again, am i really want to study there?

actually i dont even know
why? bcs i have a very very bad awkward and crappy english.

they ask for 5.5 ielts score
and i dont even think that i can get 4

and then i thought, my parents prefer malaysia than jogja's(indonesia) university
why? bcs they said malaysia is safer, closer, and etc
thats why i choose to seek for scholarship
its like i have to write 200 words essay and go for interview
soooo, its about "why i should get the scholarship?"
why?!! i dont even know
everyone like discount right?